The word rapport comes from the French ‘en rapport’ which has been translated as ‘in agreement and
in harmony’. One of the many exciting things about being a negotiator is you get to meet such a variety
of people and therefore the challenge is to connect to all the different types, which is a skill that many
sales people struggle with.
You may be familiar with the saying ‘people buy people first’ and although I 100% agree with this, I
feel there needs to be 2 words added to that saying; any ideas what those 2 words are?
People buy people first ———— ————
To give you a clue, people gravitate towards people like themselves. They feel most comfortable
with people where they have a common ground or seem to be similar to them. So I believe it should
be ‘people buy people first, like them.’
You know that feeling when you meet someone for the first time and you just get on immediately and
feel like you have known each other for ages. Wouldn’t it be great to create that with every person
In the past 40 years 2 psychologists named Bandler and Grinder have developed NLP; Neuro
Linguistic Programming. If you break those words down:
- Neuro is the brain
- Linguistic is language
- Programming is structures and patterns.
They say in NLP, if you can see the world through John Smith’s eyes, you are more likely to get John
Smith to buy from you. One of the techniques they teach in NLP is ‘matching’ or ‘mirroring’, which is
to copy some of the qualities of the person you are speaking to.
Over the phone the things to match are the tone of voice, the volume, the pace and the language. Not
the accent; as you would get many complaints coming into your branch! This doesn’t mean that if
someone is aggressive over the phone than you match that, however you don’t want to be having chit
chat about their weekend at this point.